TODDLER TEMPER TANTRUMS

Temper tantrums-just the thought of one is enough to make you cringe and wince. It can bring out the worst in all of us and it is always difficult to handle. Most parents agree that there is nothing quite like dealing with a kicking, screaming child. Though temper tantrums are a normal part of growing up and all children have them but still if not properly handled it can create lot of troubles later. Often they happen for different reasons at different ages. There are no magic cures, but there are some successful and effective techniques that can help. Toddlers throw tantrums for many reasons-some big, some small. These tantrums might sometimes take you by surprise and sometimes it will be predictable. Toddlers have tantrums because they get frustrated very easily and have very little patience. They throw tantrums when their demands are not met immediately and the mistake that most parents commit is fall into this trap. Most toddlers still do not talk much and therefore they have trouble asking for things and expressing their feelings. Toddlers also have very few problem-solving skills. Tantrums are most likely to happen when toddlers are hungry, exhausted, or overexcited. If parents give in to demands, tantrums may begin to occur with greater frequency.

How to handle a tantrum

• Remain calm
  never resort to spanking and screaming. Spanking, or screaming at your child tends to make the tantrum even worse instead of better.

• Pause before you act
  Calm yourself first and think for some time and then decide how you will handle the tantrum. Do not take hasty steps, which you might repent later on.

• Divert their attention
  Try to get your child's attention focused on something else. If your child is playing with some important thing and screams when you take away something unsafe (like your purse) offer something else to play with. This technique works brilliantly with toddlers.

• Let them calm down first
  Avoid trying to talk or reason with a screaming child. It doesn't work! Take your child to a quiet, private place to calm down. ! Stay nearby until your child calms down. Then you can talk and explain things to her gently and have a discussion about her behaviour. Use this opportunity to teach your child acceptable ways to handle anger and difficult situations.

• Ignoring your child's tantrums will also help control the situation. Just ignore the tantrum and go about doing your work. If staying in the same room with a screaming child makes you uncomfortable, leave the room. If necessary, turn on the radio and lock yourself in the bathroom for a few minutes.

• Comfort and reassure your child
  They need your love and understanding. Tantrums scare most kids and they are generally shaken up after the whole episode. So do not be strict on them. They need to know that you do not approve of their behaviour, but at the same time assure them that you love them. Understanding and curing tantrums Every child will throw up tantrums. It is a normal part of growing up. But if tantrums seem to be happening often, you might consider the following suggestions.

• Try to find out the reason of the tantrum
  Study your child's tantrum. Especially where and why it happens? Who is normally involved in it? What exactly happens before the tantrum? Keeping a watch on these things will help you understand the nature and source of your child's tantrum and will give you an idea as to how to stop it.

• Be strict and composed
  If your child throws up a tantrum before going to bed don't give in to his tantrum and offer real choices. Instead of saying "Would you like to take your nap?" say "its nap time now."

• Give your child warning before making him stop what he is doing. If you are in a park and it is time to go home say "We are going to leave the park and go home in a few minutes," This will not take him by surprise and he can concentrate on the activities he is going to do back at home.

• Don't fight and argue with your child over trivial and small things. Say "No" only to things that are really important.